Today you made it clear to me that you simply want to be left alone. No bugging you once you are asleep. And none of my personal talks like the ones I do you said. To just leave you alone and stop bugging you. You took none of it back. And I noticed that I said I expected that you’ll never change but this was your reply afterwards of me telling you that I already keep 90% of everything for myself. You didn’t seemed troubled by it or anything. I told you how when we drive and I want to speak, I don’t. At night or even during the day when I’d like to tell you an interesting thing that happened and I don’t. You don’t even feel bad in the slightest.
You asked what I was writing, I didn’t plan on answering, had I though, once again I would’ve gotten so mad, because you literally started snoring afterwards.
Also today I just made it clear how many things like working and making money I’ve done. Or how I started orders for the days, you didn’t even apologize or recognize any of what I said.
Maybe one day your dream will come true. Just wait.
Oh another thing, you blame me for saying you aren’t of any use to me, because I used to be scared what I’d do if you died, but I’ve realized that you’re not there for me ever anyways. You couldn’t come up with a single reason of how you benefit me. Which sounds bad, but these years have been anyways. So who cares. And then you act like I had hurt you when you can’t tell a single memory which you made without destroying it.
Oh, yesterday evening you made sure to tell me I’d be a bad mother because I hate kids.
Dreaming late in the night 